Penang Assemblyman Looses His Ipad In A Police Station

This is so stupid,I just have to put it up.

The assemblyman involved is the same guy that always lends his support to  mudball throwing events in Gurney Drive.

Well what can one say except this...out of of all the places he could have picked to misplace his Ipad,he had to pick a police station.

My guess is... no civilian would want to swipe even a pen off a police counter.So that leaves us with....

Anyway,I do suppose a Police HQ would have cctvs installed,right?Right? So,its pretty simple and straightforward unless...

like if it were in the case of the policemen that were called to investigate a stolen good trader at Lorong Kulit who turned out to be one of the men in blue themselves(see accompanying article dated 21st august below),instead of wasting a minute more, Koay should have flung himself like head first straight into Lorong Kulit instead.

Then his chances of getting it back,would have been definitely much higher.

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Please Return My Ipad,Pleads Pulau Tikus Rep

The Star 28th august

GEORGE TOWN: An assemblyman is keeping his fingers crossed that his iPad will be returned to him.
Pulau Tikus assemblyman Koay Teng Hai said there were important documents and information about his constituency stored in the tablet computer, which he left on the traffic counter of the George Town district police headquarters in Patani Road at about 3.55pm on Friday.
He lodged a police report the same day.
“I hope the tablet will be returned to me as it contains important documents related to my constituents,” he said here yesterday.
Koay said he had placed the iPad on the traffic counter while making enquiries about his traffic summonses.
He said he left the station immediately after settling his traffic summonses at the next counter.
“I only realised some eight minutes later that I had left my iPad at the counter.
“I then contacted one of my friends in the police but was told that the tablet was no longer there,” he said, adding that he could be contacted at 012-4279564.
George Town OCPD Asst Comm Gan Kong Meng said an investigation would be carried out, adding that police would probe the case under Section 379 of the Penal Code for theft.
“We are also going through the names of those who have paid their summonses at the same time as Koay.
“Hopefully, that will give us some leads,” he said.

He also urged the public to be more mindful of their valuables and belongings.

Four Cops To Face Action Over Watch Theft

The Star 21st august

GEORGE TOWN: Police took fast action against four personnel over the theft of 117 watches worth RM50,000 from a shop in Campbell Street.
A 44-year-old lance corporal has been suspended with immediate effect pending investigation over his alleged involvement in selling some of the watches at a makeshift stall in Lorong Kulit here, said George Town OCPD Asst Comm Gan Kong Meng.
Three other policemen, aged between 24 and 31, tasked to investigate the matter would also face disciplinary action.
ACP Gan said the three from the Datuk Keramat police station had allegedly tried to drag their feet in their investigations into the theft upon learning that the suspect was their colleague.
Police seized 42 stolen watches worth RM15,000 from the lance corporal in the 9.30am incident yesterday.
The suspect, who was off duty then, is attached to the Sungai Nibong police beat base.
ACP Gan said the case was being investigated under Section 457 of the Penal Code for burglary.
“We will investigate whether he was the one who stole the watches or whether he was selling stolen items,” he said during a “Police Meet the Public” session at Tesco Hypermarket in Sungai Dua yesterday.
Watch shop owner Tan Chee Khew, 49, had earlier received information that the 117 watches that were stolen from his shop on June 27 were being sold at Lorong Kulit.
“I went there to check. I know the watches belonged to me after checking the codes and stickers on them.
“I then called the police, but to my dismay, the three policemen who arrived later apparently asked the suspect to pack and go away.
“It was then that I suspected something was amiss,” he said.
ACP Gan said there would be no cover-up in the case.
He said a 15-year-old and a 24-year-old man had been picked up to facilitate investigations into the theft.
The police are also looking for another man to assist in the probe.

Ong Cheng Huat @ Bagan Lallang,Butterworth

The crowd puller is the toddy alcoholic drink since most chinese are averse towards patronising toddy shops frequented by indian people.

Therefore the food served here is just a lame excuse for the customers,a front for them so that they need not come across as desperate for moonshine,or mere alcoholics craving for some other daylight alternative to Chardonnay,Chivas and Stout.

Tastewise I have no complaints but I do find it ridiculously overpriced for the lousy set up,right smack in the middle of an unwelcoming,unfriendly and unkept village cum backyard/scrapyard motley of cottage industries.

Look,since when has one,when drunk or high on tipple,ever complained about the food?

One is prone to gobbling everything down like a python since the insides of the cheeks become increasingly numb and our sense of smell,ever the more clouded with each glassful.

You get my drift..

Crystal Soil and Balls @ Penang Schools,Bookshops,Toyshops & Garden Centres

First introduced to us 20 years ago,the new generation of crystal soil sold today is so pretty,that it looks like large sago balls or translucent jellies.It catches the sunlight so beautifully,even adults are mesmerised by the exceptionally eye catching range of colours.

Although inedible it has now been banned because apparently it looks so mouthwatering especially to toddlers who just have to pop some into their mouths.

School going kids just cannot resist their magic.Even if they hardly get out much,the product would have been introduced to them at their school bookshops.They would have skipped a meal and used their pocket money to purchase a packet(it's a herd mentality thing,their friends bought some,therefore they follow suit )

Fascinated primary kids can be found repeatedly playing with the expanded balls which they store in used  mineral water bottles at times hidden away from adult eyes in a corner of the room.

Do make it a point to check where they would have stashed theirs (beware that the instant you voice out they will pass it to their friends for safekeeping) and try to educate them on the dangers of this nice "plaything".

I don't believe in taking away something that they would have probably fallen in love with....unless of course you have toddlers in the house.



Before & After




What school bookshops

are selling to your kids



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"Crystal Ball" Seed Growing Kits Banned - The Star

PUTRAJAYA: The supply and sale of seed-growing kits known as "crystal balls" and other similar items is prohibited from Friday.

Domestic Trade, Cooperatives and Consumerism Minister Datuk Seri Ismail Sabri Yaakob said Thursday that importers, sellers and others defying the ban could be fined RM100,000 under the Consumer Protection Act.

He said the Government decided on the ban after receiving reports from the Kuala Lumpur Hospital and Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia Hospital of several cases of major surgery involving children aged one to five who were believed to have swallowed the "crystal balls."
The colourful seed-growing kit, also known by various other names such as Jelly Ball, Crystal Jelly, Baby Jelly, Baby Crystal and Crystal Soil, is used to facilitate the growth of a plant or as a decoration in a pot, he told reporters here.
Ismail Sabri said that seven surgeries had been performed at the Kuala Lumpur Hospital involving children who swallowed crystal balls, the latest being a 12-month-old infant who underwent an operation on Tuesday.
He said children who swallowed the seed-growing kits could experience symptoms such as vomiting, constipation, bloating of the stomach, abdominal pains, bowel obstructions and intestinal leakage.
"Looking at the crystal ball, it is easy to understand why children may think that it can be eaten. The original size of the ball is less than 0.5cm. When put in water, the jelly rubber ball can expand five to six times its original size," he said.
He added that Poland and Italy had banned the crystal balls last year. - Bernama

Lobster Village @ Jln Pantai Bersih,Bagan Ajam,Butterworth

Aside from the fantastic view of Penang island others will tell you about,let me tell you the things they won't mention.

1. Your entire order will contain one dish which will be jacked up higher than the norm compared to all the other reasonably priced dishes.This will push your grand total to the halfway of the level of Bali Hai in Gurney Drive.No kidding.Now considering the lousy makeup of the area (a mixture of low/medium cost flats and fishermens huts in the vicinity) I would say it costs a bomb.
2. If you order plain boiled shellfish,the accompanying sauce is going to greatly dissapoint you since it comes straight from the manufacturers bottle.Not only that,the shellfish they serve here is of irregular shape,you'll feel like an orang asli dining on some really wild cuisine that have not been properly cleaned of muck and mud.
3. The baked crab was terribly overcooked,that the flesh was stuck to the shell and didn't come off easily.Thus the mini mallet they provide you with MUST be utilised or else it will be impossible to wrestle the meat out.Also,even though we requested for crabs with roe,the waitress noted our order yet never bothered to inform us that it was not available
4. We ordered deep fried sotong in batter.What we got was 1 quarter sotong buried underneath 3 quarters of flour fritters with a light texture that was more suitable for the prawn fritters in loh bak stalls
5. The red tablecloths are riddled with TONS of cigarette burn marks.There are so many holes you wonder why they bother to use it as a cover.Plus it SMELLS so awful,the stink gave some of us such a headache,it was necessary to have it removed.
6. Honestly the food is nothing much to shout about,nothing remotely Penang about it,world's apart in terms of taste compared to other better known places on the mainland.I would say the taste is akin to food court standard.
7. This place is quite a rip off .Naturally before you get the bill or someone else is sponsoring your meal,it doesn't come off as such since the place looks so cheapskate and cheapo.After coughing out blood for the damage,you'll know what I'm talking about.
8. If it's the view you're after,I suggest you enjoy the breathtaking Outer Ring Road drive and stop just before the toll plaza near Pantai Bersih where dating couples like to make misty windowed pitstops.Don't forget to bring along a stash of home made heavenly buttered dash of lemon sardine (oh yes so smelly but oh so good)sandwiches with crisp cool thinly sliced cucumber slices and a thermos flask filled with hot coffee rather than waste your money here.

Restoran Ramzan @ Lebuh Ah Quee

The reason why people end up here is because of the Duck and Goose Curries.

This is one of the reasons why other Nasi kandar restaurants are smarter and better,because they know that no matter how you cook these two fowls in curries,no matter how you spice them up,they still will end up uninspiring and with a taste that is nothing special.

Some call this Penang's Best Kept Secret.

Let me tell you why.

Because after you eat it,you will want to shut the heck up and not tell others about it lest you embarass yourself when they too find out that it is such a quack recommendation,they'll demand to know who the cluck waxed lyrical about it in the first place.

Restoran Hai Onn @ Burma Road

Another hyped up,waste of time,so called Hainanese joint.

Why some bloggers would even dare to tout them as a well loved old Hainanese outlet,beats me.

God dammit,I wonder.....do these food bloggers even know what REAL Hainanese food is supposed to taste like?Or do they stubbornly like to wallow in the past,entrenched in long gone glory days?

The food is so plain cos(this calls for some ridiculous reasons)

1. almost everyone has contracted either high blood or diabetes so the recipes had to be modified

2. or since they are so growing more and more older by the year,they have actually forgotten the recipes

3. perhaps,the recipes were stored in the head,but unfortunately alzheimer's came into the picture

Next the chops are so You-Call-This-Hainanese? bleaugh ! with brown batter like deoxygenized bubbles unable to escape the semi drowning in a puddle of sauce......that the Hokkein Mee stall found within the shoplot itself sometimes does a brisker trade than Hai Onn itself.

Just be forewarned however,if you decide to give the Hokkein Mee a go,that the dish sold here is highly dependant on what time you arrive,cos everyone in this shop seems to move at an ancient time warped pace.

As if we were all hypnotised and engulfed by some nutmeg verses spewed by a looming unseen figure consumed by a mission to freeze time.

You come in here,and once you sit,a sort of stupified feeling overcomes you.

Now you understand how Some old people can spend hours in a coffee shop,shut away in a world of their own,just gazing at the walls and the floor.

As I was saying before,if you come in the morning,the Hokkein Mee soup will be like dishwater(the excuse by some stubborn loyalists is that it hasn't matured yet),only by 3pm should it have improved.

Notice I used the word "SHOULD" cos the cook is very inconsistent in ensuring its eventual day to day taste.

Next to him is a slightly hunched Loh Bak seller who likes to shuffle around cos perhaps he has athritis.Try this only if you like a strange sourish fermented tinge to your batter.All I know is that I absolutely hated it from the get go.So if you ask me.....Don't

Island Red Cafe scam part II

For cheating 93 people to invest RM 1,040,400 ,the father and son tag team of Teow Wooi Huat and Teow Chee Chow only received ONE day in prison and a mere RM 160,000 fine.

The next day another director Ong Tong Swan was on trial for the RM 16 million he was accused of having swindled out of investors.He pleaded not guilty.

Disgruntled investors have exposed their schemes,personal details,addresses,car plates,telephone numbers and those related to them on wangcyber.com.

The squealer linked Teddy Teow(the father) to Boss II Fund and EP-Link.

He goes on to explain how a falling out with a certain Tonny Shu and Money Chen,a taiwanese,culminated in the court cases.

He then goes on to name Yvonne Toh aka Toh Fong Peng as the boss of a now wound up Buy-Ebarrel and Invest-Ebarrel scam that lasted a grand total of 3 days only.

He accuses her of being The Real Boss behind Island Red Cafe.

That she is a partner to Teddy as well as a certain Michael Ng who was almost thrown into the sea by Johor investors for his part in a STG scam.

He relates that Teddy Teow and Yvonne Toh established EP-Link and that Teddy Teow is blacklisted and that is why his son's name was pulled in.

Because EP-Link didn't bring in the megabucks these scammers were after,Island Red Cafe was born,skimming millions from the sale of shareholder lots.

Peter Ong and Philip Ong apparently became scapegoats,when they were entrapped into saving their investments via PG Redcafe.

When NTV7 carried out a damning report,Yvonne Toh turned two headed snake and urge all investors to lodge police reports while Michael Ng collaborated with her and heaped the entire blame on PG Redcafe,Philip Ong and Peter Ong.

Apparently the latest tricks up Yvonne Toh's sleeve was :

Life style World Card loyalty programme which she has started in Sarawak with the HQ based in Ipoh(early 2010)

In the later part of 2010 she and Teddy were found to be listed on e-mobile at MXB International Holdings or Maxgaba International Trading Sdn Bhd

From the looks of it,these scammers are always active come what may.And ever evolving.
Look,you have all the details at your fingertips,do check out the directors of any investment scheme or MLM before you take the plunge.

If you do see any of these names there,do the wise thing and back out

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(This Posting is extracted from wangcyber.com)

Semua penipuan seperti II FUND, Buy Ebarrel, EP-Link, STG , Island Red Café dan sekarang LIFESTYLE WORLD CARD adalah daripada kalangan kumpulan yang sama yang bergerak untuk menipu ahli-ahli baru mereka. (Island Red Cafe adalah kerjasama daripada Bos II Fund dan Buy Ebarrel)

Kisah ini mulai pada tahun 2007….

Boss II Fund ialah boss EP-Link dan juga pemilik Island Red Café iaitu TeddyTeow. Website II Fund ialah Teddy Teow yang meminta tolong kawannya Tonny Shu (0124736688) Dan Money Chen +886221921594(Orang Taiwan) (001 Taiwan Island Red Café) untuk ditubuhkan. Tetapi akhirnya mereka bergaduh disebabkan Island Red Café dan akhirnya rahsia ini dibongkar keluar. Kontrak mereka saya paparkan di bawah ini.

Yvonne Toh pula merupakan boss Buy-Ebarrel. STG Scam punya Director Michael NG merupakan partner Yvonne semasa E-Barrel. Apabila E-Barrel sampai bulan ketiga, mereka bertekad untuk tutup E-Barrel dan mengajak semua downline mereka pergi money game yang lain iaitu Invest-Ebarel. Mereka beritahu semua downline, E-Barrel mereka untuk “Press Button” dan tutup dalam masa 3 hari! Jika mereka bukan boss, macam mana boleh press button tutup Ebarrel?

Pada masa itu, Michael Ng hampir dibuang ke dalam laut oleh sekumpulan investor dari Johor! Di sini, apa yang saya ingin beritahu ialah suatu Rahsia Besar?

YVONNE TOH SEBENARNYA MERUPAKAN BOSS BESAR DI BELAKANG IRC!

Dua-dua penipu besar iaitu II Fund punya boss Teddy Teow dan Buy Ebarrel punya boss Yvonne Toh bekerjasama menubuhkan syarikat EP-Link. Di bawah ialah bukti kedua-dua penipu itu berkongsi syarikat EP-Link:

Oleh kerana nama Teddy Teow telah pun diblacklist, maka dia memakai nama Teow Chee Chow iaitu anaknya sebagai director. Toh Fong Peng ialah nama sebenar bagi Yvonne Toh. Tambahan pula, nama Teddy Teow sudah blacklist dan dia keluarkan S-Class atas nama siapa? Anda tahukah??? Ya, Atas nama partner dia: Yvonne Toh! Bukti di bawah, dua orang itu memang berkait rapat sama-sama tipu orang masuk ke dalam longkang!!!

Kedua-dua kaki money game itu tidak dapat mengaut keuntungan besar dalam EP-Link. Maka mereka sama-sama merancang suatu penipuan yang jauh lagi besar: IRC iaitu ISLAND RED CAFE? Mereka simpan berpuluh-puluh Juta MELALUI PENJUALAN LOT SHAREHOLDER.

Mereka bersama-sama membuat suatu lubang besar dan enggan keluarkan duit sekali gus. Dua orang yang pak sanggup iaitu Peter Ong dan Philip Ong masuk ke dalam rangkaian mereka paling besar di Island Red Cafe (IRC), dan harapkan keuntungan bagi membolehkan mereka menubuhkan PG Red Café untuk cuba menyelamatkan shareholder dan ahli-ahli mereka sekalian.

Tapi, malangnya berita-berita buruk berkenaan dengan ISLAND RED CAFÉ secara langsung dan secara tidah langsung menjadikan PG RED CAFÉ nyawa-nyawa ikan, terutamanya berita NTV 7 berikut terus matikan PG RED CAFÉ seperti video yang tertera di bawah ini

Pada masa itu? Boss E-Barrel yang juga salah seorang BOSS Island Red Cafe (IRC) iaitu Yvonne Toh mulakan tindakan selanjutnya dengan Yvonne Toh sekali lagi berkerjasama dengan rakan kongsinya iaitu Michael Ng melalui E-Barrel. Michael NG yang merupakan Director STG (Scam) menolak semua kesalahan kepada Peter Ong dan Philip Ong dengan memanggil semua orang untuk membuat laporan polis berkenaan dengan PG Red Café tetapi sebenar-benarnya dia sendiri yang merupakan orang kuat di belakang Island Red Café (mother company IRC ialah EP-Link) yang ambil semua duit dan tidak menghiraukan EV dan EP ahli-ahli dan pelabur-pelabur Island Red Café.

BUKTI-BUKTI SAYA SERTAKAN!!! AHLI-AHLI IRC BANYAK LOAD CARD, DI TANGAN SAYA ADA BUKTI SEKURANG-KURANG 10 JUTA PUNYA. LOAD CARD SLIP, SEMUANYA LOAD KE DALAM EP-LINK, PERGI MANA DUIT ITU? SIAPA DIRECTOR EPLINK?? TEDDY TEOW DAN YVONNE TOH!!! SAYA SERTAKAN SEBAHAGIAN BUKTI UNTUK SEMUA ORANG TENGOK, SEMUA TRANSAKSI IRC LOAD KE DALAM EP LINK!!! [HUBUNGI SAYA JIKA INGIN MELIHATNYA]

DI MANA DUIT AHLI-AHLI ISLAND RED CAFE PERGI?????

Yvonne sekarang berani memulakan penipuan baru lagi dengan memulakan dari Sarawak dan ibu pejabatnya di Ipoh. Nama syarikatnya ialah Lifestyle Worldcard. Diharap jangan ada yang tertipu lagi selepas ini.Di sini, saya sertakan semua maklumat berkenaan Teddy Teow dan Yvonne Toh. Teddy menggunakan nama anaknya sebagai Director Ep-link dan Island Red Cafe (IRC):

Teow Chee Chow

Telefon 0166901222

Plat Kereta S320 & WQS222

Nombor telefon: 1) 016-2378333 2) 012-4013838 3) 013-2183333 4) 014-3313133
Alamat rumah: K1-G-08, Kenari Court, Jalan Pandan Indah 6/1 Pandan Indah 55100 Kuala Lumpur
Alamat pejabat: 5M, Jalan Pandan Indah 1/23b, Pandan Indah, 55100 Kuala Lumpur.

Yvonne Toh aka Toh Fong Peng
Telefon: 1) 0192613383 2) 0162220943 3) 0123302352

IC 701002105060

Nama suami: Raymond Ong
Telefon : 0133631449
Alamat rumah: D-20-06 D’Alamanda, Pudu Impian 56100 Kuala Lumpur

IBU PEJABAT Lifestyle Worldcard!?dulu STG SCAM PUNYA PEJABAT?
No 5A, Persiaran Greentown 6, Pusat Perdagangan Greentown, 30450 Ipoh.
Di sini merupakan kedai Lifestyle Worldcard di Kuching?No.33, Lot 5416,Ground Floor, RH Plaza, Jalan Lapangan Terbang, 93250, Kuching (formally known as Point One )
Telefon: 08 – 2457 0634

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Pengarah Dituduh Tipu RM16 Juta (Kosmo- 14th august)

AMPANG - Dua hari selepas dua pengarah syarikat Island Red Cafe Franchise Sdn. Bhd., dituduh melanggar Akta Syarikat 1965 dengan kerugian lebih RM21 juta, semalam giliran seorang lagi pengarah syarikat tersebut didakwa di Mahkamah Sesyen di sini atas tiga tuduhan menipu dan memperdayakan pelabur membabitkan RM16 juta.

Bagaimanapun, Ong Tong Swan, 33, mengaku tidak bersalah terhadap ketiga-tiga pertuduhan yang dibacakan di hadapan Hakim Azwarinda Affandi.
Pada 9 Februari lalu, Teow Wooi Huat, 44, dan anaknya, Teow Chee Chow, 21, selaku pengarah syarikat tersebut mengaku tidak bersalah di mahkamah yang sama atas tiga pertuduhan serupa.

Father And Son Jailed Over Cafe Scam (The Star- 13th august)

SHAH ALAM: A father and son have been sentenced by a Sessions Court here to a day in jail and fined a total of RM160,000 after they admitted to two counts of cheating and misleading investors of over RM1mil in an Island Red Cafe programme.
Syarikat Island Red Cafe Franchise Sdn Bhd executive director Teow Wooi Huat, 45, and his son Chee Chow, 22, who is also a director at the company, were charged at the Ampang Sessions Court on Feb 9 last year with fraudulently inducing 93 people to invest RM1,040,400.
They had committed the offence at the company’s premises in Pandan Indah between Jan 1, 2008 and Feb 28 last year.
They also pleaded guilty before Judge Aslam Zainuddin to offering shares of the company to the public through the programme although at that time, it was not involved in buying and selling shares.
For the first offence, Teow and Chee Chow were each sentenced to a day in prison and fined RM20,000 in default of 20 months’ jail.
They were also slapped with a day in prison and fined RM70,000 and RM50,000 respectively – in default of 30 months jail – for the second offence.

Judge Aslam ordered for the jail sentences to run concurrently.

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How It All Began

KUALA LUMPUR, Oct 21 — Police are investigating a restaurant franchise chain after 10 investors, including a Singaporean, lodged a report claiming one of its directors had absconded with more than RM9 million.The investors are part of a group of more than 3,000 people, mostly Malaysians, who bought shares in the franchise known as Island Red Cafe. About 200 Singaporeans are said to have invested in the company, which claimed a monthly turnover of about RM2 million.Each lot of shares was sold for about RM6,000.The first Island Red Cafe opened in Kuala Lumpur in 2007. The cafe is known for its range of local and Western food and has 15 outlets throughout Malaysia.The 10 investors lodged their police report at the Nusa Bestari police station in Johor Baru on Sunday.The MCA Youth’s consumer affairs bureau, which promotes and enforces consumer rights, is working with the police to deal with complaints.The Singaporean who lodged the report, Ng Ee Siong, 50, said he was lured into investing in the business by its concept.Ng, who works in a multi-level marketing business in Singapore, said that in return for a lot of shares that he bought some time last year, he was given a voucher worth RM100 to spend at any Island Red Cafe and RM300 in cash on a monthly basis.He said: “I could easily have made back my principal sum in two years that way and earned a profit too.”He said he bought a second lot of shares late last year and also introduced five Singaporean friends as investors.But Ng claimed that he stopped receiving the vouchers and cash payouts earlier this year, adding that he had not been able to contact any of the company’s four directors — including the one who is said to have absconded.Attempts by The Straits Times to contact some of these directors yesterday were not successful. — The Straits Times

Western Food in a Chinese Temple @ Mount Erskine Roadside(night)

This place is a complete waste of time and the food is utter crap.

In my opinion it is absolutely disgraceful not to mention totally disrespectful to allow a food outlet to operate from a place of worship.

The customers that dine here are of a special breed.These are people that have nothing else better in the world to do but sit by a busy roadside,inhale the dust and fumes,all the too willing to wait from as early as 6.30 pm so they can start staking their claim on their favourite table and hopefully possess the aura that can absorb some ultra powerful energy from some hovering cosmic entity.

After they finish their meal here they will make a quick gesture to the resident deity.

Whether it is a sign of reverence or fear of repercussion I really have no freaking idea.

I reason that perhaps they want to be blessed,that if one partakes of a meal here,their luck could get better with the deity's presence....its a taoist thingy I guess.

That is what makes a good meal to the strange bunch that make a pilgrimage here.

"Ong" is all that matters,never mind taste,never mind the weirdness of it all.

In short,this is THE altarplace for those that worship food sucked of its soul where awful manufactured papier mache type of chops are the order of the day.

Years back,the owner only used to offer chicken dishes cooked in every imaginable way.

In every single way no matter how impressive the dish sounded it ended up bad.The cordon bleau chicken was aptly named because it had the supernatural ability to turn one Blue as a Smurf  and claw their way into the realm of the Na'vi tribe from Avatar.

Their grills are what one gets from a failed half baked potato,"mao shan" ritual, one that can even make Ye Olde English in Ipoh look like five star establishment.

Now they have gotten bolder,daring to offer other meats on the menu as well.Their cooking,sadly,didn't improve.

No skill,just plain and downright H-O-P-E-L-E-S-S.

Take for example their western soup,a Malaysia Boleh ! advertisement for the ethnic chinese engineering feat of combining oil palm and hydrogenated vegetable oil into a liquid geyser in a bowl.

Don't look at the size of the crowd.

No amount of prayers or congregation of higher beings,can stop the food from coming off as pure horrible-locity.

With food this excrutiatingly fork bending awful,it truly defies logic that they still dare to call themselves Hainanese.

Shameful !

KLites in Penang

There are so many of them in the island and on the mainland today.

Comprising of job seekers and holders,some of whom were transplanted by KL head offices and factories,another segment consisting of property speculators even traders and especially of late an influx of those in the food related chain,they arrive thinking that this is an easy place to settle into,just a wee bit laid back,that's all.

From the conversations I have carried out on my own with them,I do gather that the transition is not all a bed of roses and am gonna highlight the differences between the 2 societies today.

Just in case you are from the busy capital,think you have had enough of the city and just want to getaway to this little hideaway,here's a list of things that you might want to seriously consider

1. The Cantonese Language

Nobody speaks Cantonese well here.Thus there will be much miscommunication or lack of it. 

In certain parts of the city and markets,speaking to people above the age of 40 could invite a rather hostile reception due to clan clashes between the Hokkein speaking and the Cantonese centuries back.

You might feel as if you offended or brushed people the wrong way if you do not pick up Penang Hokkein in due time.

In anyway when you come here equipped with Klang Hokkein,some will look down on you as uncouth,others will make fun of you.

You WILL feel extremely lonely.

2. Racial Polarisation

Anyone can strike up a conversation with another race in KL and happily yap away like a pair of long lost friends but this does not happen in Penang.Unless of course you know the person,In fact even another Chinese does not take too kindly to empty banter over nothing if they have no ties or friendship with you.

This is not a friendly place comparatively.Each race sticks to his own kind.And the chinese to ONLY their acquaintances.

Malays and the Chinese are hardly seen even going out for lunch together here.Indians sit amongst themselves.

Malays will try as far as possible to avoid Chinese populated shopping centres and the Chinese vice versa.

As such if you have been used to just walking up to total strangers and striking up a conversation,people here might give you a "do I know you look" and will give you the cold shoulder irrelevant of whether they are Malays or Chinese.Indians are a whole lot friendlier but sometimes it IS hard to tell a Malay apart from an Indian person.This takes some getting used to.

3.Food

From the thousand and one complaints I have heard over this matter,the general consensus is......the food here is too sweet,the assam laksa is not sour and food portions are a complete rip off bordering on the profiteeringly pathetic.

PLUS

You won't be able to find a good Hokkein Mee(the black wok fried KL version).

The Kung Fu Chow noodles will be irritatingly darker and comes with no egg.

The wantan mee will be one of the most horrible.

Economy rice mostly bad and outrageously expensive.

Your curry mee will start to loose its appeal since it doesn't come with Chicken Curry and long beans.

You can forget about finding a hearty bowl of Mee Yoke.

Same goes for a good plate of Nasi Lemak.

You will absolutely swear off Yong Tau Foo and will find the Tau Foo Pok,Foo Chook unpalatable.

You will not be able to track down a good plate of Chee Cheong Fun with all the sidelines.Nor will you be able to find a decent Teo Chew Porridge meal to sweat it out.

The Nasi Kandar will be too oily.Paus will be hopeless.

On top of that.the Chicken Rice versions sold here will be plain and downright weird.

Conclusion : 3 bowls of noodles on the island still cannot fill the tummy

4.Interstate Travel

Some Penangites have been known to get out to Komtar ONLY ONCE A YEAR.

Others have never crossed Penang Bridge till they became teenagers.I kid you not.

Thus for one to travel from Komtar to Tanjong Tokong will be considered "Waaaaaaa! Soooooo farrrrr aaaahhhh???"

Perplexing of course for KLites who will not bat an eyelid to drive all the way to a Selangor oil palm plantation for a packet of beggars chicken.

5. The Kiamsap Factor

No kiam sap person worth his salt on the island buys another a drink here in the pubs.You can forget it."Belanja" is only for suckers.Don't be viewed as one.

Should you decide to hold a birthday party for your child here,do be prepared to receive broken seashells encased in an old coconut shell given by the rich boy living in a four storey mansion.Again another true account.

6. The Beautiful Penang Girl Myth

The gorgeous ones either originated from Ipoh or came from Alor Setar(where the menfolk can be more stunning than the women) or have indigenous Kadazan/Caucasian bloodlines.

Tip: just take a good look at the schoolgirls and old women on the roads,it should give you the true picture.

The little enclave of Tanjong Tokong's Malay girls,well those are unpolished brown caramel stunners but only before they hit their twenties wherein they just start to loose their shine.

Lastly (with great reluctance )upon some 'peoples' insistence,I just have to include some very doll like Butterworth Ah Lians on this list of beauties too.So there.

I hope all this helps you decide before you take the plunge to relocate here and I have to offer another shoulder to cry on should our paths cross somewhere along the line

Happy reading and do choose wisely.

Environmental Perpetrators In The Sea Of Stupid

Yesterday,on the 8th of august 2011,another event was held to further condemn Gurney Drive.This time 12,000 mudballs loaded with so called Effective Micro-organism (EM) ravaged the coastline to turn it into a swamp.

Johor has spent a total of 3 million in the past 3 years to use this 'miracle' technology.

Figures for Penang are UNAVAILABLE.
WHY?
It is Not Free.Our stupid volunteer forces,free labour is.

Someone has to pay for this but nobody is talking or questioning them for accountability.

Twenty years from now when people ask you, just who were the idiots that thought of this carnage,I hope you can still refer to this blog for The Who's Who on The List of Stupid

Will try to list out as far as possible as to when the events were held and whom were the members of the public,corporations,companies,schools,who mooted,supported,participated or threw their support behind the preposterously misguided 3 year Green Gurney Drive Initiative (GGDI) that started in February 23rd,2010 if that is what they will have you believe.

In actual fact,this exercise started way back in 2009.Points to a perhaps that a 3 year contract was inked?

Other related information that you might like to know is that Dr Teruo Higa is the inventor of the EM Mudball whereas Jamof Sdn Bhd. is their distributor based in Kota Tinggi Johor.

Pak Soo(Mr Soo Lee Choo) is THE business link recommended by EM Malaysia a facebook page for the business facade notorious for picking up volunteer services to turn mudballs (FREE LABOUR)into something they will BILL sponsors for.

Question and statements posed on their facebook which are GRAVE cause for concern.

1.EM.1 is made in Malaysia.

2.The Malaysian version EM.1 is NOT drinkable

3.Drinkable EM(EM-X Gold) can only be obtained in Japan and the USA

4.If Malaysian EM.1 is only meant for farm and animal use, are these plants and animals safe for human consumption. Please explain......woundn't these living things become part of human food chain. I guess if its safe for animals then naturally it's safe for human consumption

(There was no reply)

Now ask yourself this,which big gun running around barefoot in Komtar or MPPP would be a sucktomer or a living guinea pig experiment unless there is something to benefit from the deal?

IT IS NOT FREE.....the mudballs are purchased,cost unaccounted for as sponsors are always towed in.

Bottomline is Green Is The New Cash Cow.It is COSTLY.

Wow.Like why are we supporting this again?

Somebody or many are making big bucks out of turning Gurney Drive into a Swamp and it is US the Penangites who will have to pay for this folly in the future.

8th august 2011

Damage : 12,000 mudballs

---------------------------

1. Koay Teng Hai (Pulau Tikus Assemblyman & Chairman of GGDI)

2. Datuk Dr Ong Hean Tee (Penang Environment Working Group Chairman & project facilitator of GGDI))

3.Phee Boon Poh (state Health and Environment Committee Chairman)

4.Rose Ng (Anjung Gurney Hawkers Association Chairman)

5.Peter Nast (G Hotel's General Manager)

6.G Hotel Employees

7.Students & Teachers of SMJK (P) Union

8.Students & Teachers of SMK Jelutong

9.Students & Teachers of SMJK (P) Convent Datuk Keramat (interviewed by the press were students Angela Lee and Chan Yin Chian)

3rd August 2011

Damage : 2,000 mudballs

-------------------------

1. Koay Teng Hai

2. Datuk Dr Ong Hean Tee

3. Marina Tan (Connection Programme 2011 Director of Methodist Girls School)

4. Loke Bee Keow (Geography teacher of Methodist Girls School)

5. 33 Methodist Girls School volunteers

8th August 2009

(from then onwards this date was declared World EM Mudball Day)

Damage : One Million mudballs to 200,000 depending on which blur rep the press interviewed

Theme : One Million Apologies To Mother Earth

-------------------------------

1. Lim Guan Eng (Chief Minister of Penang)

2. Professor Teruo Higa (inventor)

3. Soo Lee Choo (the businessman)

4. Lydia Ong Kok Fooi (State Youth,Sports,Family and Community Development Chairman)

5. Phee Boon Poh

6. MPPP

7. JKR

8. 18,000 volunteers from various schools,government and public facilities bodies,welfare organisations

More to come when I find the time

Stop The Rape of Gurney Drive

Have you seen the state of Gurney Drive's shores lately?

It looks like Pantai Morib or the mudflats of an empty padi field during low tide.

Can it be reversed?It would take a heck of a lonnnnng time before those imbecilic well meaning misinformed 'environmentalists' get the message that they are playing a great part in further destroying it's beauty.

Each time some 'bright' sparks thinks they want to do something about the sludge problem that is actually caused by the hawkers throwing their soups and refuse from Anjung Gurney into the sea,they throw a semi carnival/party and chuck in thousands of mudballs into the sea.

Why not set up a night patrol starting from 11 pm to 1 am every single night to confront them and prevent the rot?No,confronting the hostile hawkers would be way too risky.That is not for chickens or the weak hearted.

Just what are the long term implications of introducing foreign micro organisms into the sea?Well,the first two occasions organisers did this,when they got the public as well as companies to volunteer arm power,plantlife from the nearby mangrove swamps festered into the area and started growing.Everyone took it as a good sign.

But when that happened certain individuals didn't take kindly to it cos a mangrove swamp view across Gurney Drive would not be good for business or property prices.

So the plants somehow mysteriously died or were removed.

Point is,no matter how good the organism is in breaking down household waste and garden refuse,no matter how wonderful it is in converting those wastes into useful vinegar,all that is carried out in a controlled and confined area unlike the vast open seabed.

Tell,what good would it do the environment to force 2 thousand mudballs down its throat?Mudballs that will eventually transform sludge into vinegar IN THE SEA?

Nature has a way of correcting itself,but when one introduces a foreign lifeform,it could and will ravage its original form.

If the Green Penang Committee continues mooting and supporting this rape of the environment we are going to end up with a Taiwanese,Kao Shiang coast beach.Beautiful and pristine but terribly smelly like the inside pipes underneath the kitchen sink due to a war between foreign cleanup agents and various refuse.

Stop this nonsensical event before it is too late to turn back the clock.How very sad to see it take shape before our very eyes with no one daring to speak up.

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33 MGS Students Throw Their Weight Behind The Environment

(The Star 4th august)

GEORGE TOWN: It was a fun yet meaningful activity for 33 Methodist Girls' School (MGS) students who played their part for the environment by throwing 2,000 mud balls into the sea along Gurney Drive.

Connection Programme 2011 director Marina Tan, 17, who arranged the event, said the students made a difference to the environment by volunteering for the event.

“Their participation proves that they walked the talk' and took action on environmental issues.”
Geography teacher Loke Bee Keow said the programme was to help raise awareness among the students about the importance of doing their part for the environment.

Present at the event were Pulau Tikus assemblyman Koay Teng Hai and Green Gurney Drive Initiative co-chairman Datuk Dr Ong Hean Tee.

Koay said the event was part of the Green Gurney Drive Initiative launched on Feb 23 last year.
“To reduce organic pollutants, we throw mud balls with effective micro-organisms into the sea.
“The micro-organisms will slowly leak out of the mud balls within five days and decompose the organic waste in the sea bed thus reducing the sludge.”
The event is a quarterly basis project under the initiative which is expected to end by December 2012.

8tv's Ramadan Advert

Woah! We've made the international headlines again.Why?Watch this.

Silicone Geckos

No.This has and never will go past my lips.

The most exotic animals I ever had in my entire life have been squirrel meat,terrapin lock stock and barrel,pig's brains and frogs legs.All of which I threw up after the rascally elders of our family informed me of what had just gone into my gut.

Coming to the gecko,most Malaysians nonchalantly label it a lizard by any other name.Two types of lizards are consumed locally.

One,the monitor lizard by sex crazed men looking for ANOTHER aphrodisiac so they have an excuse not to confine their sticks to just their wife,the other a dried specimen sold in chinese herbal shops.

The Tokay Gecko is a new fad that sparked a frenzy over the past two years.

When people discovered that a large one could make people in China cough up a hefty sum for it,part time lizard hunters with their families in tow,descended in droves from all over the country into the northern states whacking bushes,tree stumps scouring the countryside and semi jungles in the attempt to strike riches.

See,these animals could only be found on trees at secondary jungles and bush areas.

Last year,the situation reached such a critical point as they had been almost hunted to extinction,frightened to death,or shacked up in petshops or small time traders private homes .Even the puny ones were not spared.Caught to be fattened up awaiting the right weight,price and buyer.

Apparently they couldn't grow fast or fatten up quick enough for the greedy harbourers.

At this point I shall make things up to explain the ridiculous fix the animals have found themselves trapped in.

(Fiction)

Once upon a time,a lizard trader,started to scratch his head wondering how he could make his tokay grow bigger.As he sifted through his $68 per month iphone he found the inspiration he needed.As he looked at the before and after pictures of some local Malay artistes he thought this to himself "If they can make their face bloat and balloon up,why not go to one the many beauty houses and give my livestock a silicone injection just before delivering to unsuspecting one time sucktomers?"

(Back to reality)
The good thing is,the animal will die before it even can get eaten by whomever was desperate enough to resort to this 'cure'.

The bad thing is,the animal is condemned and will die of an overdose.Hello? Never hear any protest from those animal rights people?Why so quiet when you have no overseas sponsorship or donations?

Walla.....read on about the latest scam below

--------------------------------------------------------------

New Straits Times

KOTA BARU: Dishonest animal traders have resorted to injecting silicone into geckos to enhance the size of the reptiles for bigger profits. Geckos, a lucrative business in Kelantan and the southern Thailand provinces, are being injected with silicone so that traders can put a much bigger price tag on the reptiles.

In Kelantan, rumours have spread like wildfire that the gecko is a cure for major diseases such as HIV/AIDS and this has caused prices for the reptile to shoot up.

A gecko trader who wanted to be known only as Azli said the silicone injections ploy had been uncovered only recently after a number of geckos bought from suppliers across the border died a few days after being purchased.
"I took a dead gecko to an animal expert who discovered that its head did not match the oversized body," said Azli, adding he had paid RM40,000 for the lizard.

Upon further checks, he said it was found that the gecko had been injected with silicone and salt powder to make it big before the sale.

"The expert also suspected that the gecko had died of an overdose of silicone," said Azli, 45, from Rantau Panjang.

He said he had bought the "fake" gecko after receiving photographs from a supplier via an email in November.

"I went to Sungai Golok to take delivery of the lizard and paid the high price as the gecko was big. A buyer was already waiting to buy it from me later. But, the gecko died a few days after I brought it back home," he said.

Azli said he believed there were 10 gecko suppliers across the border taking advantage of Malaysians' interest in the reptiles.

He said locals should not simply pay if they were offered large-sized geckos, especially if the price was unreasonably high.

Meanwhile, state Wildlife Department director Rahmat Topani confirmed that syndicates were involved in producing the unusually big geckos through artificial means.

"I have been told that some victims were cheated of up to RM100,000 by a syndicate, which targets rich buyers. As far as I know, the geckos have no medical benefit at all and it does not cure illnesses," he said.

A recent report had quoted a medical practitioner in the Philippines, Dr Ofelia Monzon as saying that the lizard -- which he had referred to as the tuko (Philippine gecko) -- had not been proven to cure serious ailments like cancer, HIV and AIDS.

Penang Assam Laksa.No More No.7

The whole of Penang is in euphoria but at last count,our Assam Laksa got knocked off the list when CNNGo opened the list to public voting.

At no.7 now is Japanese Ramen.Like what?That tasteless excuse of a hot water soaked noodle?You have got to be kidding.

Penang Assam Laksa has been downgraded to 26th placing with Singapore chicken rice,tom yum and french croissant overtaking it.Rendang Indonesia is currently No.1.

.

I bet no one will put this up and trumpet the Penang Assam Laksa fall from grace in any blog or paper.Instead they will still harp on it maintaining seventh spot.

Anyhow it doesn't matter,this list is NOT credible.Let's not further embarass ourselves by associating our cuisine with it.

Notwithstanding the netizen disputed CNNGo list,lucky number seven has gotten food writers (naturally it has to be the famously inept bunch listed here on this blog) all in a frenzy traversing stalls,mustering a dignified pose as their armpits burst sweatily and their heavy makeup melts while they busily slurp away under lousy rickety umbrellas in a world class rush to be THE authority,the most referred to reviewer for Penang Assam Laksa.

All good lovey dovey cottonwool reviews of course will come out of this.Just wait for it.They will be out in due time.I saw them in action.

None will be as brutal as mine.

Right.

Now take a deep breath.Come back down to earth for a second.

Some questions one would want to ask is....

Where exactly did CNN surveyors taste their Penang assam laksa ?

Was it in Penang Gurney Drive?Air Itam?or Gasp! KL???

In a hotel? Airport?Roadside hawker? or Restaurant?Someone's kitchen?

Update:

The best are of course to be found in someone's kitchen which is not accessible to all.Some Penang assam laksa home versions have been corrupted with thai laksa influence so that doesn't count.

The rest who don't have or know a great granny occassionally churning this out in her home will have to be content with the roadside hawker's offerings.NOBODY...I repeat nobody in their right mind would try this dish in a hotel.The few Nyonya restaurants here have strong Singaporean and Malaccan influence so that's a no go for me either.Anyway Nyonya laksa (anyhow cooked) sucks big time if you ask me cos it is way too rich just like the Siamese laksa.

As we all know if one is in KL it is NOT hard at all to locate stalls that purposely mislead the unsuspecting ones with the word"Penang Assam Laksa" although they are world's apart.

The most glaring difference would be this.

The KL version as well as Gurney Drive one would be as toe curlingly SOUR as broad daylight tomyam with less garnishings and helpings of salad kampung,raw sliced onions,mint and bunga kantan.(Gurney Drive's version is an exception in Penang because the hawkers got fed up of hearing complaints from KL tourists as to why their damn assam laksa was NOT sour)

The Penang recipe however,comes with a gentler sourness tempered by generous lacings of sweet sugar.

Have discounted the possibility that they are referring to the Malay or Indian version.Cos the Malay version has sliced hard boiled eggs in it with brown kesum leaves carelessly laddled out together with the soup.

While the Indian version is an acquired taste which real Penangites love to bits cos it is brain damaging hot and BITTER.

I certainly hope no Malaysian pulled a fast one on them and served them Maggi Assam Laksa with garnishings on the side.Cos although most Penangites scorn the maggi version to the point of not wanting to even touch the dish no matter how delicious it smells,add the powder to some fishmeat curry without them knowing and they will immediately give you the thumbs up.

I for one think the Maggi version is to die for.Not the noodle (horrid) but the Assam Laksa soup itself (worldclass)

Now why would I even consider maggi or even think that the reviewers might have been misled? I quote them "especially great when fused with ginger".Aiyoyooooo.Did they mean ginger flower?Bunga kantan?Beats me.

Ultimately the big question is just WHICH PENANG ASSAM LAKSA were they referring to?